Most adoptees have little to no information about their birth family before their adoption journey begins. I have been personally involved in several searches, including my own, and I have watched many from afar in various adoptee groups. I have seen and heard all kinds of crazy adoption stories, and I’ve learned that it’s best to use the time during the search to prepare mentally for what you may find out.
You could find out that your birth mother was the victim of rape. You might learn that your birth parents already had six kids and couldn’t take care of another. Your birth mother may have wanted desperately to keep you, but her parents forced her to place you for adoption. Your birth father may have had an affair with your birth mother and threatened her to place you so as not to ruin his family. It’s possible that your birth father never knew you existed. Your birth mother may have been told that you passed away, but instead the hospital handled your adoption. I am not exaggerating when I say there are an endless list of possibilities. The interesting and strange part is that you never know which information will strike you emotionally until you hear it.
Take my case as an example. I had pretty much decided that I was ready to search, but I needed a DNA test. We live on a very tight budget. One of the adoption groups I’m in had donors giving away tests at Christmas. I got on the list but was contacted later and told that had run out of tests. They gave me the info of a different group to reach out to. I did, and they sent me an Ancestry DNA kit. I collected the sample and sent it back immediately.
No comments:
Post a Comment